Posterizing: It Can Happen to You

You thought you were safe. You thought it was something you didn’t have to worry about. “I don’t even play basketball,” you say to yourself every time you see a vicious dunk during an NBA game. “That could never happen to me.”

For those among us who don’t play basketball (or even those of us who do, but don’t play against anyone capable of doing things like this), being posterized isn’t something we normally concern ourselves with. It just isn’t something that can happen to you at school, work or out shopping.

But, oh, it can friend. Oh, it can.

As the clip below shows, posterizing might just be the new Tebowing. And that is not a good thing for any of us.

You realize what this means, right? You’re no longer safe anywhere.

Your boss could unleash a tomahawk jam on you as you try to send an email to Jerry in accounting. A woman might throw down an insane tip-slam on you while you look at avocados in the grocery store. What’s that? You can’t decide between chicken parmesan or carbonara pasta at your local Italian restaurant? The Maitre d’ just 360 dunked on you.

It’s a new world now, friends. No one is invulnerable.

If there’s one piece of advice I’ll leave you with as you try to survive this cruel, new world it’s this: Don’t jump youngblood.

Don’t jump.

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Charlie Crespo (@Little_Utopia) is the editor-in-chief of Little Utopia.